Howie Carr needs a hug
Dear Howie:
I get your strategy. It’s the ol’ “columnist tries to incite a riot to sell papes” trick. I know it well. I know it works well. The comments section of your latest piece has already blown up with irate responses, and here I am linking to it. You win! Way to go!
I get it because I’ve been in your position: trying to get people to read. I’ve been a writer for a long time. I’ve been a reporter, a critic, a blogger, you name it. I’ve pissed off my fair share of people in the process because when you speak your mind, there are sure to be people who strongly disagree.
Here’s what I don’t get: being lazy in order to get people to read. This column doesn’t do anything to back up a single word you’ve written. It’s what happens when Shaughnessy turns into CHB – a strong writer capable of creating sharp, compelling copy leans back in the desk chair and phones it in, making sure to hit the touch points that will get people riled up.
Cliche after cliche after cliche, Howie! You can do so much better than that! Mom’s basement, smoking on flights, stoned kids, bomb threats, Mayor Mumbles and Zoo Mass, fighting and, of course, the athlete who doesn’t give a damn about the fans. Blah blah blah. If you’re going to do it, at least be clever about it!
Five minutes of concentrated Thinking Time would have yielded something sharper than what you presented, I’m sure. “Consider the next Bruins marketing campaign: At Least You’re Not Still in the Parking Lot Three Hours After We Lose!”*
Or, better, how about setting up the reader with the cliches and then driving home a serious point? If you’re talking about the bandwagon fans, why not hypothesize about “how easy it will be to cruise down those three miles of Route 1 each Sunday, without that pesky crowd tailgating in motel parking lots or walking their 12-jerseyed backs in the direction of Patriot Place”? Why not mock-ruminate on which PP store will close first from lack of business: Puma or the Christmas Tree Shop?
Cliches will sell papers any day of the week. You and I both know that. But just because it can doesn’t mean it should. Polish off a column with some real barbs and flash to it. If you’re going to try to kick Patriots fans while we’re down, Howie, at least do it with a sort of style.
Respectfully,
Victoria
p.s. It’s okay to admit that you’re just crushed because Brady was on your fantasy football team. We’re all here for you, buddy.
*It should go without saying, but this and the paragraph following aren’t my actual thoughts or feelings on the matter.
When YOU get paid high six figures for mailing it in at a crappy tabloid and a crappy radio station, THEN I’ll
listen to your log cabin stories about your previous jobs. (THIS is your career? Yikes!)
This comment proves my point perfectly. Thanks, Amanda!
Howie is trying to shoot his way out of town. He tried to get out of his contract with awful WRKO and he failed miserably. Now he apparently thinks he can finish the job by irritating Boston sports fans. What the Pink Hamster doesn’t get is that no one – outside of his Fox News loving apologists – is taking his act seriously any more. Not even Whitey Bulger cares anymore, Howie. Sorry.
Thanks for the insight, TAB – it just reads like he was sitting back, yawning, typing the cliches with one hand. “Stupid fans, jerk of an athlete…yawn, yawn…dumb Red Sox…”
Seriously – his schtick has just gotten terribly old.
I literally read the article and was like “What a crappy article” and it was not even because I genuinely love my Patriots (sorry to disappoint Howie, but the possessive pronouns I use never change when it comes to Boston sports). He didn’t actually say much about football, it was more slamming Bostonians. And his whole premise was “why are you all so upset that he got hurt” when a normal person in life would never want to see ANYONE injured like that, let alone the linchpin to your favorite team.
I think Howie has his panties in a far stranger bunch than any fan does.
The column read like the equivalent of a cranky old man standing on his front lawn, shaking his fist and threatening to whup the young whippersnappers. Muttering under his breath, “These kids these days, why I oughta…”
Victoria- I wonder what Howie’s response will be to the Pats winning on Sunday. I assume we’ll be hearing about public servant hacks, Whitey, and his undying love for Sarah Palin. Not a word about how the Whiney Patriots fans enjoyed their Sunday, eh?